How do you handle your arguments?
Is it helpful? Or harmful?
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We all need to have difficult conversations sometimes. The way you start these conversations will affect the way they go.
There are 2 ways to start a conversation:

1. A harsh start-up

A harsh start-up is when you go straight in with a verbal attack, for example: 'You never think about me!'
The other person is likely to be defensive and you won't get the support you need.

2. A soft start-up

A soft start-up is a way of asking for something you want without blaming the other person, for example: 'I'm worried about how we're going to get everything done.'

This makes it easier for the other person to listen, so you can sort things out together.

How to practise a soft start-up

Instead of saying: 'You never help out! I have to do everything by myself!'

Try saying: 'I'm feeling stressed out. I'd really like some help.'

It's the same thing, but it's more likely to get you the help you need.

So, before you start a difficult conversation, ask yourself if there's a better, softer way to start.

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