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Let's Talk SEND: July 2025 - Social and emotional mental health

Rather than use resilience, the term ‘window of tolerance’ is much more helpful. With a knowledge of the nervous system and the impact of trauma this is important. The ‘Window of tolerance’ implies compassion, trauma-informed awareness and curiosity whereas resilience implies there’s weakness and we need to build up strength. Words are important. Are you therefore considering a change in this terminology?

Yes, we are actively reviewing the language we use. We’ve heard from young people and families that terms like “resilience” and “complex” can feel unhelpful or even alienating. “Window of tolerance,” by contrast, reflects a more compassionate, trauma-informed approach and encourages curiosity and understanding. 

We’re committed to using language that resonates with the communities we serve. Our communications team, alongside our participation lead, regularly gathers feedback from young people and families to ensure our terminology is inclusive, clear, and supportive. We’re open to evolving our language and will continue to listen and adapt. 

My child has ADHD and is moving from primary to secondary school after the summer, he is extremely anxious about it. what can I do?

This is a common concern, especially for children with additional needs like ADHD. The key is preparation and communication. 

Many schools offer enhanced transition plans for children who may find the move more challenging. This can include extra visits, one-on-one tours, photos of the new environment, or meeting key staff in advance. If this hasn’t been offered, you can ask the school’s SENCO (Special Educational Needs Coordinator) what support is available and whether a more tailored plan can be put in place. 

You can also help at home by: 

  • practising the new routine for example, the journey to school
  • talking about what will stay the same
  • keeping in touch with friends who are also moving up
  • asking the school if there’s a quiet space or key adult your child can go to if they feel overwhelmed

If you’re unsure who to contact, reach out to the school’s SENCO or your child’s new tutor. And if you’re looking for more ideas, our Mental Health Support Teams in schools (MHSTs) offer webinars and resources specifically about managing transitions. 

Will schools change and offer more flexibility, move to communication policies and stop threatening parents with criticism, judgement, fines and even imprisonment? Are you putting any pressure on government to stop this policy?

We understand these concerns and agree that a more compassionate, flexible approach is needed. 

While national attendance policy is set by the government, schools, Multi-Academy Trusts, and local authorities all share responsibility for how it’s implemented. In Dorset, we’re working with schools to move away from rigid behaviour policies and towards more relational, inclusive approaches that prioritise understanding and partnership with families. 

We actively promote: 

  • relational policies that focus on connection, not punishment
  • therapeutic Thinking, which encourages inclusive, reflective practice
  • trauma-informed training for school staff to better support children’s needs

We also challenge schools when we believe their approach isn’t in a child’s best interest. While we can’t change national policy, we continue to advocate for more compassionate, child-centred practices at every level.